Flirting at work can be tricky because it’s not always easy to tell if someone likes you or if they’re just being polite. You don’t want to make the wrong moves or misinterpret someone’s intentions.
So, in this article we are going to talk about the main signs a female coworker likes you but is hiding it.
How to Tell if A Female Coworker Likes You But Is Hiding It: 11 Signs
If a woman in the workplace is into you but is trying to hide it, she won’t do things like adding you on socials, asking you out for lunch, telling you how good you look in that suit or coming at your desk. Nope, it won’t be that easy.
However, there are some more subtle behaviors she may display that could indicate she’s interested. And this is what we’re going to cover in the following sections.
While going through the article, remember this: one sign alone doesn’t necessarily mean your female coworker likes you. However, if you see at least two thirds of the following clues, she’s probably into you.
Why listen to me? I’m Sira Mas and I’m a relationship coach. I write about self-improvement, love, dating and psychology. My work has been featured on large publications such as Mamamia, Plenty of Fish, Ladders, Entrepreneur and Thrive Global.
1. She’s different whenever you’re around
When a female coworker likes you, she may act differently around you. You just notice she’s not the same person as when she’s just with her other coworkers.
She may laugh more, blush, or even change the tone of her voice whenever she sees you. Or she may be so shy that she doesn’t say a word and avoids eye contact when you’re around.
I had a colleague who was 100% herself when she was with her female coworkers but changed completely every time the guy from marketing she was so into entered our office. She tried to sound and look more feminine.
In short, the way she moved, her voice, and even the words she used changed. She didn’t even realize it.
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2. She starts to show an interest in the topics you talk about
A woman who starts to take an interest in the topics you talk about may have a secret crush on you. She may remember small details about what you’ve said during conversations.
And she may start doing things like trying your favorite restaurant, listening to that progressive rock band you mentioned to her, watching that Netflix series you like, or start reading your favorite books. Now the question is, does she do the same thing with her other coworkers?
See, if she doesn’t, that’s a sign she’s probably into you – yes, even if she’s trying not to show it.
3. She smiles and laughs a lot when she’s around you
One of the signs of a female coworker likes you but is hiding it is she smiles or laugh a lot when she’s around you. She may even seem overly excited when you talk to her. For example, you may see the Duchenne smile.
Normally, this type of behavior happens because she gets nervous around you – and she can’t control it.
4. She remembers small details about you and your conversations
As we mentioned in one of the previous points, a coworker who’s into you will tend to retain a lot of information about you.
If she remembers many details about your conversations and about you, she either has a good memory or she’s interested.
A good way to understand if she likes you is to pay attention to how much she remembers about what other people say. Does she have the same impressive memory when it comes with other friends and coworkers?
5. She blushes or looks away when you make eye contact
If your female coworker blushes, stutters or looks away when you make eye contact, it means she’s nervous around you. She may just feel intimidated if you’re her boss or someone important in the company.
Se may be shy and behave like that with every man she doesn’t know well.
Or she may be into you. Again, if you can focus on how she behaves with other coworkers, especially men.
6. She looks uncomfortable or jealous when you talk to other women
A coworker who seems jealous when you talk to other women may be into you. In this case, my advice is to focus on her body language – because she won’t come there and tell you, “Hey, I don’t like this, don’t talk to her!”
As explained in Psychology Today, you should pay attention to surveillance cues: when someone is feeling jealous you may notice increased attention towards you, and hovering behavior.
Maybe she’s not actively looking at you and this other woman, but she stays in the room to listen to your conversation. Also, her feet will probably point towards you without her even realizing it. She may also become nervous, start to fidget and give you quick glances to check the situation.
7. She often compliments your work
As I mentioned before, a woman who likes you at work and doesn’t want to show it won’t compliment you on your appearance. However, she may give you compliments for the way you work.
She may express her admiration for your negotiation skills. Or she may compliment you every time you give a presentation. If she does that often, and she does that more with you than with other coworkers, she may be into you.
8. She always remembers important dates like your birthday or work anniversary
A female coworker who always remembers important dates like your birthday or work anniversary may have a crush on you.
Now, as we mentioned for almost every other point, pay attention if she remembers these things with others coworkers too or not.
9. She talks with you about the future, such as long-term career plans
A woman in the workplace who talks to you about future career plans may be secretly into you. She might start taking an active interest in your work life, asking what positions or projects you are working on and offering advice and support on how she can help.
She may also start mentioning potential internal job opportunities that could benefit your professional growth and development inside the company (maybe because she wants to keep working with you!).
10. She often offers to help you with tasks
If you’re not her boss, this may be a sign your female coworker likes you. She may start to proactively offer her assistance before being even asked. This shows she wants to help you succeed in the projects that matter most to you.
Also, it’s an easy way for her to get your attention without coming across too obvious about it.
11. She starts to dress nicer when she knows she’ll see you
If she likes you, she may start to dress nicer, especially when she knows you’ll be around.
For example, she has a meeting with you or your team and she dresses nicer than usual. Or it’s the spring company party and she wears a new beautiful dress and her hair is just perfect – because she knows you‘ll be there.
Or, you all go for drinks on Friday after work, and she looks just perfect. This could be a clue she likes you, especially if combined with the other signs explained in this post.
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Final Thoughts
There are many subtle signs that a female coworker probably likes you but is hiding it.
These can include showing an interest in the topics you talk about, smiling and laughing a lot when around you, offering to help with tasks, talking about the future or noticing small details and remembering important dates.
All of these clues may point to a secret crush between two colleagues in the workplace. If you like her and you’ve seen at least seven or eight of these signs more than once, maybe it’s time to ask her out for lunch.