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17 Signs You Are Unattractive, According to a Dating Coach

Are you looking for some signs people may find you unattractive? If so, you’re not alone.

Many people find themselves wondering if they’re attractive, or if there are things they should improve about themselves.

While there is no definitive way to tell if you are unattractive, there are certain clues that can help you understand where you stand.

In this article, we’ll explore the main signs people may find you unattractive, as well as what you can do to improve and feel more confident.

How to Know if People Find You Unattractive

Why listen to me? I’m a relationship and self-improvement coach. I have been writing about relationships, personal development, dating, and social skills for more than four years and my work has been published on large publications like The Good Men Project, Plenty of Fish, Entrepreneur, Ladders and MamaMia.

1. You’re a Terrible Listener

Active listening is a key component in having pleasant conversations, building strong relationships and making others feel heard and understood.

When you don’t actively listen, you basically show that you’re not interested in what others have to say. And that makes you unattractive to most people.

If you feel you need to improve in this area, make an effort to practice active listening skills.

Give people your full attention, ask follow-up questions, and show empathy in your responses. With time, you’ll notice that your relationships will be more fulfilling and people will be more drawn to you.

2. You Redirect All Conversations to Yourself

It’s natural to share your experiences and thoughts with others, but constantly redirecting conversations to yourself can make you highly unattractive.

Try to strike a balance between sharing your opinions and allowing others to talk about themselves.

By practicing this habit and making an effort to engage in meaningful dialogue, you’ll come across as more interesting and relatable.

Remember this: Everyone’s favorite topic is themselves.

3. You Interrupt People While They Talk

One of the signs people may find you unattractive is if you often interrupt others while they talk.

This type of behavior is a big turn-off for most people. It not only shows a lack of respect but also creates an impression that you’re not interested in what others have to say.

If you want to change how others perceive you, it’s essential that you let them finish their sentence before jumping in and expressing your opinion. It would be even better to ask follow-up questions and let them talk more.

Avoiding the bad habit of interrupting others can not only help you have more pleasant conversations, but it also allows people to enjoy their time with you.

4. You Act As If You Know Everything

No one likes a know-it-all. Acting as if you know everything can make you appear arrogant and unapproachable, which will leave a negative impression on others.

Instead, embrace your curiosity and be open to learning from others. This attitude will make you more attractive, as people appreciate humility and genuine interest in their knowledge and experiences.

5. You Are Condescending

Being condescending is unattractive and can damage relationships.

Treat people with respect and avoid talking down to them. If you find yourself feeling superior, take a step back and remind yourself that everyone has valuable insights to offer.

By adjusting your perspective and being more open-minded, you’ll boost your attractiveness and create stronger connections.

6. You Smell Bad (And People Seem to Keep You at a Distance)

One of the signs people probably find you unattractive is you don’t take care of your personal hygiene – and as a result you smell bad.

If you smell bad, people will notice. Period.

Personal hygiene plays a significant role in how attractive you are to others. If you notice people avoiding close contact, it may be time to evaluate and improve your hygiene habits.

Regular showers, using deodorant, wearing fresh clothes, and wearing a good perfume can improve your overall attractiveness.

Remember, smelling good is an easy (and essential) way to improve other people’s perception of you.

7. Your Hair Is Always Dirty

It’s totally fine to have bad hair days. But if it’s becoming a daily issue, people may start to find you unattractive.

Keeping your hair clean and well-groomed is essential for maintaining a presentable appearance. In fact, dirty hair can even lead to unpleasant odors or skin issues. So, make sure to:

  • Wash your hair regularly, using a shampoo and conditioner that suits your hair type.
  • Don’t forget to brush your hair to avoid tangles and evenly distribute natural oils.
  • If you have a greasy scalp, try using dry shampoo in between washes to maintain freshness.

8. You Are Too Loud

Being loud in public may be drawing negative attention, and could make you unattractive.

While it’s good to talk confidently, it’s essential to be mindful of the volume of your voice, especially in shared spaces.

9. You Have Bad Breath

Bad breath can be a significant turn-off and make you seem unattractive. It may be caused by factors like poor oral hygiene, certain foods, or health conditions.

However, there are several ways you can avoid bad breath. For example, simply brushing your teeth at least twice a day and flossing regularly are great ways to improve your oral hygiene.

Also, as explained on Cleveland Clinic, another thing that can help you keep your breath fresh is using sugar-free breath mints or chewing gum.

10. Bad Posture

One of the signs you’re probably unattractive is you halways have a ad posture.

Poor posture not only affects your physical condition but it can also make you less attractive to others. Slouching, hunched shoulders, and a drooping head can project an image of low self-esteem or disinterest.

To improve your posture, make a conscious effort to sit and stand tall with your shoulders back and try to build good habits like stretching in the morning and practice yoga or pilates.

11. Attention-Seeking Behavior

Think about this for a second. Think of a person you know who always tries to get everyone’s attention – almost in a desperate way.

Are they attractive? Do you really want to be like them?

Let me guess, the answer to both questions is probably a big no. Am I right?

If you constantly seek attention or validation from others, people may find you unattractive. This type of behavior is an indicator of low self-esteem. You may come across as needy and insecure, ultimately pushing people away.

Learn to be comfortable in your own skin, embracing your unique qualities. Also, focus on building genuine connections with others rather than seeking their approval.

It may improve how people perceive you.

12. You’re Rude

If you are constantly interrupting people, making snide remarks, or belittling others, people won’t enjoy your company.

Nobody likes spending time with someone who is always rude and dismissive. So, take a moment before speaking, and consider how your words might impact those around you.

A simple change in attitude can make a significant difference in how people perceive you. By being polite and respectful, you might find that others are more drawn to you, and your overall attractiveness will improve.

Recommended read: The Subtle Art of Dealing With Rude People

13. You’re Passive-Aggressive

Passive-aggressive behavior, like making sarcastic comments or giving backhanded compliments, can make you come across as unattractive.

In case you’re not familiar with this type of behavior here’s what it looks like: The passive-aggressive person, instead of addressing issues directly, resorts to subtle hints or snarky remarks, expecting things to magically change.

Another typical behavior of passive-aggressive people is they don’t follow through.

For example, picture this scenario: You ask them to help you with something but they don’t want to. Instead of openly tell you they don’t feel like helping you or that they don’t have time, they will commit at the beginning.

They say yes because they are uncapable of assertively saying no. And then, they simply won’t take care of the task as they promised.

If you feel this somehow describes how you behave, work on expressing your thoughts and feelings more openly and assertively.

People are generally more attracted to individuals who communicate confidently and are straightforward in their interactions.

woman with blue hair looking the ocean
Photo by Darshan Gajara en Unsplash

14. You’re Arrogant

An arrogant attitude can be a turn-off, even if you do have a lot to be proud of. Nobody wants to be around someone who constantly brags, looks down on others, or talks only about themselves.

Your arrogance might make you unattractive to others, so try to practice humility and build the habit of understanding other people’s points of view.

Focus on listening more, showing curiosity, and praising other people’s accomplishments. And try to let go of the need of always being right.

15. You Don’t Show Empathy

A lack of empathy might also make others perceive you as unattractive.

If you’re unable to understand or care about others’ feelings, it can make it difficult for people to connect with you on a deeper level.

Start by trying to put yourself in other people’s shoes and make them feel understood. If you can do these two things, your relationships with others may improve significantly.

16. You Never Make Eye Contact

Avoiding eye contact can make you seem unapproachable.

It might be hard to connect with others if they feel like you’re not really paying attention to them.

When you’re talking to others, make sure to maintain eye contact at least 40% or 50% of the time.

This way you show them that you’re engaged and interested in what they have to say. This simple change can drastically improve how others perceive you.

man looking at himself in the mirror
Photo by jurien huggins en Unsplash

17. You swear too much

Some recent studies have demonstrated that swearing has its benefits.

However, no matter the benefits, swearing like a sailor doesn’t make you attractive. And it’s usually a sign of poor self-control – which most people tend to find unappealing.

Final Thoughts

Signs of being unattractive can range from having a poor hygiene to consistelnly being rude to others. There are behaviors and habits you can change to improve how others perceive you and increase your self-confidence.

However, remember that you could do everything right and there will always be people who don’t like you.

So, don’t give too much importance to how others perceive you. You are beautiful, and you are worthy of love, regardless of what others may think of you.

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Photo: Darshan Gajara en Unsplash

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