In this article we are going to talk about how to tell if a girl likes you – yes, even she’s shy – and the signs you should look out for.
I have to admit that some women can be enigmatic. And most times this happens when they don’t want to hurt a man’s feelings or are simply being polite.
Yes, there are also women who just want attention, but that’s another story.
The problem with this is men often misread behaviors that don’t necessarily mean someone is into them.
Below, you will learn how to tell if a girl likes you.
While going through the article remember this: one sign alone doesn’t necessarily mean she likes you.
However if you see all the following signs — or almost all of them — it’s very likely that she has a genuine interest in you.
How to Tell If a Girl Likes You – Sign #1: She Doesn’t Make Excuses
Before meeting his current girlfriend Marta, my friend John dated several women.
I remember that for a long period of time — almost two years — his dating life seemed to be a disaster; the reality is he met women that just weren’t right for him.
One day he told me he was dating Olivia, a girl he really liked and thought could be the one.
After a few weeks, he told her he felt ready to start a more serious relationship, and she replied she was not sure.
The reason behind Olivia’s reluctance was she had to take care of her younger brother and “didn’t have time” to be in a more serious relationship.
A few weeks later, she ghosted him.
When a girl genuinely likes you, you won’t hear excuses such as “I don’t have time to be in a relationship because I have to take care of my younger brother, my younger cousin, my uncle, or my grandma.”
Usually, if a woman starts finding reasons not to see you, it means she’s probably not invested in the relationship as much as you are.
Also, one of the signs a girl genuinely likes you is she is enthusiastic to see you more often or take things to the next level, if you ask her.
As Jeremy Nicholson M.S.W., Ph.D. explains in an article in Psychology Today, someone who is truly into you will invest in the relationship, and you won’t feel you have to convince them to spend time together.
How to Tell If a Girl Likes You – Sign #2: If She Can’t See You The Day You Suggest, She’ll Tell You When She’s Free
When John was dating Olivia he often felt he had to beg her to see her. When he suggested a day, she simply told him she was busy. And he usually had to ask her, “OK, so when are you free?”
You see, there’s a big difference between “I can’t see you today, sorry, hope you’re doing well” and “I can’t today as I have an appointment with the doctor at 6 pm, but I want to see you, are you free tomorrow in the afternoon?”
As senior reporter Talia Lakritz, explains in Business Insider, someone who’s interested in you will immediately reschedule a date.
If a woman tells you she can’t see you the day you suggested and doesn’t make an effort to find another day to see you, she’s probably not interested in seeing you again . Or she’s playing hard to get which is not good anyway.
If you see she’s proactively trying to find a day to see you instead, it’s generally a good sign.
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How to Tell If a Girl Likes You – Sign #3: She Doesn’t Leave You Wondering
When my friend John started dating Marta, his current partner, he told me he felt relaxed, things were easy and she didn’t leave him wondering if she liked him back.
He asked her out and she said yes; he texted her and she replied in a reasonable amount of time; sometimes he initiated conversations and at other times she was the one texting him first.
They were equally invested in the relationship.
As I said before, when a woman is really into you, things feel easy.
During a conversation, she will engage with you as much as you engage with her. She will be transparent and slowly share details of her life with you.
If you text her, she will actively interact with you. If she doesn’t reply immediately because she’s busy, she will probably reply within a few hours .
Like Marta did with John. You won’t feel you have to force things with her.
As writer Farrah Daniel explains in Mind Body Green, “If someone goes out of their way to interact with you — in person, over the phone, or through text — it’s generally a good sign.
This means not only they’re attracted to you, but also they want to foster a connection that goes beyond the surface.”
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How to Tell If a Girl Likes You – Sign #4: She Is Genuinely Curious About You and Remembers a Lot of What You Told Her
When John told me he felt Marta was truly into him, I asked him what made him think that.
He replied that, unlike the women he had dated before, Marta was always genuinely interested in what he had to say.
And remembered almost everything he told her.
If a woman likes you, she will give you her undivided attention during conversations.
Also, she will be genuinely curious to know more about you. She’ll probably ask you questions to know more about your life and your past.
As Farrah Daniel explains, someone who’s into you will tend to remember the details you shared with them.
Someone who is not into you instead won’t notice the small details. Their brain won’t bother to retain information about you.
Like all the other clues mentioned in this article, this sign alone doesn’t necessarily mean a woman is into you.
However, when combined with more clues it’s a great sign.
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How to Tell If a Girl Likes You – Sign #5: She Removes Barriers Between the Two of You
I’m not a huge fan of body language signs, as they can easily be misinterpreted. However, there’s a non-verbal clue worth mentioning.
As Jack Schafer Ph.D. mentions in an article published in Psychology Today, if someone sits next to you and then removes any object between the two of you to get physically closer, it’s a sign they probably like you — or at least feel comfortable around you.
If a woman does this, and she also displays the other signs mentioned in this article, it’s very likely that she’s into you.
It’s also true that a woman who’s not into you probably won’t remove her purse or any other object to be physically closer to you.
Sign #6: She Does Nice Things For You
I remember when John and Marta celebrated their first two months together. He was enthusiastic.
He told me Marta cooked a special dinner for the two of them and also prepared a delicious cocktail.
Considering all the other signs John already told me about, it was clear to me that Marta was genuinely into him.
When a woman does nice things for you, she probably likes you.
This doesn’t necessarily mean she has to spend three hours to prepare a four course dinner.
If she consistently does nice small things for you like driving you to the airport, or buying you a souvenir when she comes back from a trip, she’s showing you she cares.
Sign #7: She Is Happy to Introduce You to Her Loved Ones
After their first few weeks together, John and Marta began to hang out with their friends too. Marta started to introduce John to her closest friends and John did the same.
As I mentioned in other articles — and as Jeremy Nicholson Ph.D. explains — if someone likes you, they will probably introduce you to their friends sooner or later, and then to their family.
You will be a part of their life. It’s when someone is not really into you that they won’t be interested to introduce you to anyone.
Sign #8: One of the Most Important Signs a Girl Likes You Is She Doesn’t Send Mixed Signals
A girl who seems interested in you one day and ignores you the next is probably not that into you.
Obviously, there are always exceptions.
However, if you see a consistent pattern of hot and cold behavior, the person you like might not be as invested as you in the relationship.
Breadcrumbing is one of the most common behaviors of someone who is not into in you, but still needs your attention.
According to Val Walker MS, the term breadcrumbing refers to the following:
When someone appears to engage with you by leaving a trail of “breadcrumbs” — little tidbits — but never really commits to anything solid or specific — sharing a decent slice of their loaf. We often call this pattern “stringing someone along” or “keeping options open.”
An example of breadcrumbing is when someone sends you a text every now and then asking you how things are.
And then they disappear for weeks — or even months — as soon as you tell them you want to see them in person.
The behavior of a woman who is into you is just the opposite.
She will consistently be in contact with you.
Sign #9: Pay Attention to Her Behavior on Social Media
Does she post things you think are or might be related to you? Anything related to an inside joke that you two have?
Another thing you should be pay attention to is this: after meeting you and adding you on Facebook or Instagram, did she change her profile picture?
Did she started to post pictures of herself?
Can you see a change in her behavior after she added you?
If she’s doing any of these things, she might be trying to get your attention.
In fact, these behaviors on social media – especially when combined and frequent – are usually pretty good signs a girl likes you.
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Sign #10: You Just Know It
You can look out for all the signs in the world.
However, when someone truly likes you, you just sense it, because they consistently show it to you through their actions.
When a girl is interested, you don’t spend hours in front of the phone waiting for her reply.
You don’t spend hours with your friends analyzing her behaviors.
And you won’t find yourself overthinking.
How to Tell if a Girl Likes You – Summary
- She doesn’t make excuses;
- If she can’t see you the day you suggest, she’ll tell you when she’s free;
- She doesn’t leave you wondering;
- She is genuinely curious about you and remembers a lot of what you told her;
- She removes barriers between the two of you;
- She does nice things for you;
- She is happy to introduce you to her loved ones;
- She doesn’t send mixed signals;
- Pay attention to her behavior on social media;
- You just know it;
Here Are the Signs a Shy Girl Actually Likes You – By Aymes
In this section we’re going to talk about the signs a shy girl likes you.
In the 1980s and 1990s, researchers conducted studies to determine the subtle signs that a woman is interested in a man.
They meticulously tracked the ways that humans show romantic interest in others through their non-verbal cues.
The researchers selected locations for their research that were intended to draw single people in such as pubs, clubs, and coffee shops.
They based their studies on the body language and mannerisms that men and women exhibited when interested in someone.
These studies did not discriminate and analyzed people at random, so some of their subjects were extroverted and others were introverted.
And one thing was certain, whether a person was shy or outgoing, their body language did not lie.
Although the signs that a shy girl likes you are subtle, they are noticeable if you know what to look for. And today we are going to share these telltale signs with you.
You Can Feel Her Eyes on You (But Only When You’re Not Looking)
This can indicate attraction in the first few seconds of an interaction between two people. It is the way that a woman draws a man in.
Shy women often use their gaze to signal their interest in a man without approaching him.
For example, when you walk into a pub for a beer with your buddies, a woman may glance your way until you see her, then look away.
She might also repeat this a couple of times, and once she sees you’re returning her gaze, she might exhibit open body language and turn towards you.
This is her way of showing you that she is open to having a conversation with you. And it also means she’s looking for you in a room full of people.
If you approach her, be respectful and courteous. Don’t use lewd pickup lines or comment on her appearance, as it might scare her away.
Comment on the weather, what’s on the television in the pub, or ask her if she’s from out of town.
Treat her like a friend, not a conquest. And if you’re at a loss for how to attract love interests your way, take a look at this article about the habits of charming people.
She Mirrors Your Movements (Without Even Knowing It)
When a shy girl likes you, she might subconsciously copy what you are doing.
It’s her way of reciprocating your interest subtly. When you lean forward, she will lean forward too, when you tilt your head, she will tilt her head.
These actions are not only prevalent in conversations when the two parties are into each other romantically, but it’s also how people behave when they are actively engaged in conversation with one another.
When a shy girl subconsciously wants you to know she’s interested, she will show she is interested in what you are saying. And she will unconsciously mirror your mannerisms during your discussion.
This is not something you can reciprocate without someone noticing, it’s a subconscious mannerism that most people do during a conversation.
So just allow the conversation with the girl you like to flow and see what happens.
One of the Main Signs a Girl Likes You Is She Laughs at Your Jokes, A Lot
If you’re conversating in a group, and you notice that the reserved girl that you like is consistently laughing at your jokes – only at your jokes – she might like you.
When someone shy is put into a group situation, they may not contribute to the conversation, but they will show appreciation for your funny jokes or stories by laughing at them.
She may giggle, laugh nervously, or smile at you during the conversation.
This is her way of conveying interest and showing that she shares your sense of humor.
Jeffrey Hall, the associate professor of communication studies at the University of Kansas conducted a study of couples in 2010.
The study involved videotaping fifty-one couples (with their consent) and observing their non-verbal cues during the conversation.
During the study they found that there were four different types of flirting styles:
- Traditional: This type of flirt believes that the man should approach the woman and the woman should let him pursue her as opposed to doing the chasing.
- Sincere: These people communicate their interest through focused attention on their conquest and self-disclosure.
- Polite: Polite flirts are shy, and tend to show interest in very subtle ways like body language.
- Physical: Physical flirts tend to be more open with their sexuality and show interest with a forward style.
One of the things that this breakthrough study found was that regardless of flirting style, the couples who laughed at each other’s jokes were the couples who had a romantic attraction to each other.
Men tend to use humor to gauge how interested a woman is in them.
If she appreciates their sense of humor, this is usually a sign of interest in them.
So if you like a shy girl, make a joke, and see how she responds to it.
She may laugh at one joke, however that doesn’t necessarily mean she’s into you.
Make sure to focus on the pattern.
Does she always laugh at your jokes, more than she does with other guys?
Does she also display other signs mentioned in this article?
Her Friends Tell You That She Likes You
I asked my husband if he has ever dated a shy girl and he said yes.
Then I asked him how he knew she liked him and he said that her friends told him.
If a woman is really shy, this may be the only way you’ll know if she likes you.
If you’re crushing on a shy girl but not getting anywhere, try to talk to her friends.
And don’t be afraid to ask them about her.
However, keep in mind that if you talk about her to one of her friends, they will probably tell her.
This is also a good way to find out if she is single for sure, and to get to know some of the most important people in her life.
Her Feet Point Towards You
Another little known verbal cue that shows romantic interest is the way someone faces you.
If a shy girl likes you, she may stand with her feet facing towards you in an open stance.
This is a good signs, especially if you notice she does that every time you’re around.
The reason behind this is because our feet point us to where we want to go, so if her feet are pointing your way, she may be getting ready to approach you or be approached.
Also, when someone has their feet in this position, it lowers the amount of personal space between you, and this makes it easier for you to get closer physically.
If you notice this sign, also note her body language, if she is making eye contact, this is very good.
However, as I mentioned before, make sure to focus on the pattern, not on the single event.
Also, if she’s engaged in a conversation with someone else, I would suggest waiting until she is done with that discussion before approaching her.
She Blushes When You Talk to Her or When You’re Around
Blushing is so cute, right?
That pink tone you see when someone becomes flustered isn’t always due to embarrassment.
It can also be a sign that someone has a crush on you.
Blushing is actually a reaction from the body making adrenaline, and it happens in response to a fight-or-flight situation.
This is why the blood rushes to your face and causes your cheeks to flush.
When a shy girl likes you, you may notice she blushes if you’re in a group situation and you talk to her.
She may even become flushed as soon as she sees you.
Either way, she is responding in a way she can’t control. So if you notice it, don’t point it out because this will embarrass her.
Strike up a conversation, and attempt to calm her nerves and distract her.
She Is Constantly “Fixing” Herself (When You’re Around)
One of the signs a shy girl likes you is she fixes herself when you’re around. And she tends to do it every time she sees you.
You may notice her adjusting her top, fixing her hair, putting on lip balm, and checking herself in reflections.
According to a study on female courtship conducted by Monica M. Moore of Webster University, when a woman feels attracted to a man, she will fix herself up in an effort to appear more attractive.
Keep in mind that this is a common thing women do in general. Many women are often fixing and touching their hair or applying makeup.
However, if you see her fixing herself more than usual when you’re around, that’s probably a sign she wants to look good to you.
In this beauty-fixated world, a preening woman is not uncommon.
So before making your first move with a shy girl, we would suggest observing her body language as well.
If you notice your crush is not only preening but also showing other signs, approach her and start a conversation.
She Looks at You in a Certain Way
There are many ways a shy woman can signal her romantic interest in a man.
However, according to the Journal of Sex Research, and the six studies they completed about flirtation and facial expressions, there is one facial expression and body language position that indicates that a woman likes you.
The researchers used the Facial Action Coding System to determine the “magic” look of an interested woman.
Her head is turned to one side and tilted down slightly. She has a slight smile, and her eyes are looking towards you.
In the six studies, when a woman had this look, men responded very positively.
This indicated that not only does this expression show interest, but it is also attractive to men.
While these signs all point to a woman being interested, we are just scratching the surface when it comes to attraction.
So make sure to also check out this piece that discusses the psychological signs someone actually likes you.
Signs a Girl Likes You: Final Thoughts
Recognizing the signs a girl likes you is not easy.
However, the clues mentioned in this article can help you gauge whether she is into you or not. Even if she is shy.
Remember that one or two signs alone don’t necessarily mean she likes you, always focus on the big picture.
If you see that a woman you like consistently wants to spend quality time with you and shows a genuine interest in what you have to say there’s a high chance she genuinely likes you too.
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